Author Topic: [mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]  (Read 4510 times)

[stealth]

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« on: June 13, 2005, 07:58:54 AM »
I think I'm pretty well done with women for the year, if not the rest of my life (no, just kidding).  Or maybe I should just stick to whacking off.

I was pretty happy to have met a nice girl about a month or so ago.  After a couple of weeks it seemed to be getting a bit full on - as in constant text messages, numerous phone calls and the like.  Our third date went pretty badly - I found out she's a pretty sore loser and was a bit appalled when she got really pissed off over losing to me at ten-pin bowling.  We had lunch but it just felt really awkward seeing someone lose their cool over something so trivial that was meant to be fun. She apologised, but my pet hate is people who have to win at all costs.

I basically said look I'm happy to have this as a casual thing and I'm not after a relationship - not to say I'm going to see other girls while seeing her, but I just wanted to keep it simple.  We met up on Thursday night for dinner/movie and I really came to that I don't want to spend anymore time with her.  She was really rude to the waiter, talked about herself the whole night and later on, without going into details, she kind of freaked me out by some of the shit she was saying.  Alarm bells were going off in my head - this girl is trouble.

Anyhow, this weekend was a long one, with the Queen's Birthday public holiday on.  And I said to her on Friday, I have things to do and I really just want a break and spend some time alone over the weekend.  And despite having said this, 20 text messages and 5 missed calls to my phone...well I don't need anymore reason to give this whole thing a wide berth.

I'm not sure the best way to handle this - I still have a CD of hers and I know she'll want it back.  The thing is I don't want to have to do this face to face or over the phone.  I don't know how she'll react because she has show a side that is really over the top angry and in no way do I want to provoke her.  Confrontation has never been my forte.

I guess I can either: a) suck it up and be a man – face to face b) call her up and arrange to giver her back her CD or c) drop it back at her place while she is not home and just let the whole thing ride out over a few weeks, making other plans and telling her eventually that I do not want to see her.
...

ober

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #1 on: June 13, 2005, 08:05:09 AM »
Suck it up.  Then go back to pulling your pud.  Rosy will never let you down and won't get pissed off if you sleep around (with Lefty).  

Oh, and sweet avatar :thumbsup:

[stealth]

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #2 on: June 13, 2005, 08:09:33 AM »
Yeah I'm going to suck it up - I'll just make sure I'm in a public place that doesn't have easy access to knives.  NIN rock.
...

Govtcheez

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #3 on: June 13, 2005, 08:12:57 AM »
Get her to sign up here and break up with her over a PM.  That'd be real classy.

drakkenkorin

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #4 on: June 13, 2005, 08:16:30 AM »
it only becomes classy when he posts that PM conversation as a general announcement or sticy.

>>I think I'm pretty well done with women for the year, if not the rest of my life<<

*me planning trip to australia
"I know that when I get home from work, I like to read the paper, sip a nice glass of Cabernet, and call people faggots on the internet.  Because I'm an adult." - Govtcheez

[stealth]

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #5 on: June 13, 2005, 08:20:37 AM »
"oh you didn't get my p.m.? really? well we're over baby...and I'm marrying a homosexual goth ex-funeral director from Texas!"
...

ober

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« Reply #6 on: June 13, 2005, 08:34:24 AM »
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA... true perfection.  It's a thing of beauty.

Exluddite

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #7 on: June 13, 2005, 09:00:26 AM »
A friend of mine has a great break up scenario that involves Jack Daniels, sex on a trampoline, and a black magic marker.
Leave the gun. Take the canolis.

ober

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #8 on: June 13, 2005, 09:07:38 AM »
Sounds kinky.  Mind sharing?

Nice avatar, BTW ;)

Rob

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #9 on: June 13, 2005, 09:08:25 AM »
>>my pet hate is people who have to win at all costs

You would have hated me as a teenager. I've grown up (or got used to losing). I still play to win though, which pisses my missus (whoa - poetry) off no end.


>>sex on a trampoline

Great Album name.

If you break with her kieran, just hide your rabbit and any saucepans for a while...

Exluddite

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #10 on: June 13, 2005, 09:39:53 AM »
Quote from: ober
Sounds kinky.  Mind sharing?

Ok, it goes something like this (like I said, the crucial elements are Jack Daniels, a trampoline, and a black magic marker)...
You drink the Jack Daniels, making sure that she drinks her fair share and is good and drunk. You then disrobe and have sex on the trampoline. While having sex doggy style near the edge of the trampoline. Near the end of this, you reach around with the magic marker, draw a line from her forehead, down her nose, and to her chin. You follow this by jumping back and bouncing her off the trampoline. When she hits the ground, you tell her that you never want to see her again. Don't let her back on the trampoline, and splash her with JD periodically if there is any left.
She is now drunk, upset, and has a black line down her face. Odds are that when she leaves, she'll be driving fast and erratically, resulting in her getting pulled over. The cop will undoubtedly ask "Why do you have a black line down your face?"
I guarantee that she'll NEVER call you again.
Leave the gun. Take the canolis.

-KEN-

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« Reply #11 on: June 13, 2005, 09:57:41 AM »
Or she kills herself, or gets a DUI, or worse, kills YOU...

That's just not as cool as I thought it would be. I figured it was a real story.

1/10 for trying.

ober

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[mike myers]woman - whoa-man[/mike myers]
« Reply #12 on: June 13, 2005, 10:27:24 AM »
I don't get the marker and line part of it?!  Is it just to make her look more stupid than she already is?

pianorain

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« Reply #13 on: June 13, 2005, 11:51:16 AM »
Of course.  It's pretty much impossible to take someone seriously when they've got marker on their face.
[post=3832]axon[/post]: I hate it when people copy my originality :p

hans

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« Reply #14 on: June 13, 2005, 09:21:28 PM »
Run. Run fast and far away. Unless the sex is really good. In which case, try and work out some sort of friend trampoline action from time to time.
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