An octopus walks into a bar and says "I can play any musical instrument you like".
The Englishman gives him a guitar which he then proceeds to play better than Hendrix himself.
The Irishman then points him towards the piano, which he plays even better than Elton.
The Scotsman throws him a set of bagpipes; the octopus fumbles around with them for a few minutes and the Scotsman says "What's wrong. Can ye not play it ?".
The octopus says "Play it ?... I'm gonna f%*k her brains out once I get these pyjamas off!"
