John Murphy hoisted his beer and said, 'Here's to spending the rest of my
life, between the legs of my wife!'
That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!
He went home and told his wife, Mary, 'I won the top prize for the best
toast of the night.'
She said, great & what was your toast?'
John said, 'Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside
my wife.'
'Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!' Mary said.
The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street
corner.
The man chuckled leeringly and said, 'John won the top prize the other night
at the pub with a toast about you, Mary.'
She said, 'Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's
only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the
other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come.'