Reminds me of something I wrote a little bit ago.
I figured it out.
I don't really care about anything. I could put up a really big act that I care about a lot of things, but when it comes down to it, I don't really care enough to put effort into the things I "care" about.
And then when something goes wrong I have no idea how to handle it. And that's when I feel like I'll fall apart.