Author Topic: Flirtations with rhythm and rhyme!  (Read 3900 times)

aran

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Flirtations with rhythm and rhyme!
« on: June 21, 2007, 10:23:50 PM »
Marriage
Men with knives can hurt themselves
As much as truth’s been soiled;
Men tell truths with lies at heart,
Their hearts will get them boiled.

Girls that love will die afraid
Of fools who loved the prices paid.

Men sell cars and guns and lives
As much as heaven lets one
But what if heaven’s gone to lunch?
Will death be less than certain?

Girls that tempt will tempt their fate
For fools who come, but come too late

What death awaits the clever man
Who with a woman forms a bond
That God himself would have approved
To tempt such death, to gall the strong
To fight honest and then be conned.

Preface (to a tale of War)

He knew of that which she would want
but not what she would get
for she and he, deliberately
would break what long had set.

What strength of arms and force of will
so long had hoped to make
a foolish girl with ill-got gains
would all too eas'ly break.

For with his will she ran away
when he saw she would spy
on his ignoble projects that
involved an evil's eye.

An evil's eye ill-got by him
would evil soon beget
when they together rondezvous
where ne'er they should have met.

A death would take the spying girl
a death that she deserved
for troubling where she should not tread
and wishing to disturb

a creation with her in'cent eye
that she should never see
a creation that would shake the world,
and end more than just she.



this apparatus must be unearthed.

Rob

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Re: Flirtations with rhythm and rhyme!
« Reply #1 on: June 22, 2007, 07:52:00 AM »
>>Their hearts will get them boiled.

I don't know why, but I don't like that line. Other than that, good stuff as usual. How've you been?

aran

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Re: Flirtations with rhythm and rhyme!
« Reply #2 on: June 25, 2007, 05:10:57 PM »
Here's a sonnet of sheer badassery:

A badge of sorrow, pain, and suffering
he wears as if it were of his own flesh
for he alone has borne the awful weight
of thousand worlds destroyed at his behest.
A thousand souls unquenched lie in his path,
a thousand dreams lie shattered in his wake,
and if you stop to do the gory math
you'[l see these treach'rous folds are glory's make.
Aside him Reason lies a bloody mound
And Faith and Love have failed his thirst to slake
Cries and screams, he wears them as a crown,
for veangeance is all his for him to take.
Though gored by fortune, mankind won't give way
when evil reigns it reigns until it's slain.


And an incomplete one...

The dreadnaught gathers forces in the sky
to battle with that Gods of then and now
when collaps'd are the threads of every fate
fullfilled are the dreadnaught's soldier's vows.
A sky turned black by evil industry
fires unquenched by heroes or by Gods
the dreadnought makes his fate of steel and blood:
his lover, Chance, will guarantee good odds.
The fools that fight fall quickly as storm rains
their wives and friends die slowly in the gut
of th'dreadnoughts leviathan that coils again
around a world shortsighted and
this apparatus must be unearthed.

aran

  • the capital of djibouti is djibouti
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Re: Flirtations with rhythm and rhyme!
« Reply #3 on: June 25, 2007, 05:16:49 PM »
>>Their hearts will get them boiled.

I don't know why, but I don't like that line.
"Boiled" as in "severely scorned by women to the point of boiling" as well as in the sense of being boiled to death by forces greater... It make sense to me and it rhymes with soiled. I can't think of a better way to say it short of rewriting a stana.

Quote
Other than that, good stuff as usual. How've you been?
I'm quite well. I'm working for IBM now as I finish up my BS and MS in Computer Science while living in Poughkeepsie.  I admined another forum for a while (much bigger than flashdaddee ever was), but another one of the admins in his stupidity literally took the site out from under me, so now I'm back...

yeah. It's been a while since I've posted here much.
this apparatus must be unearthed.